Wondering if I soaked in enough time with her. 

Was I truly intentional those first 19 months of being just her mommy? 

Was this postpartum depression? 

Do all moms have this way of thinking when having two under two? 

Or was my life circumstances (parents dying) playing a role in my guilt of not spending enough time with either?

Those few weeks were so long as I really considered what I was feeling and my mood got worse the longer I kept these feelings to myself. I finally opened up to Anthony and told him how I was feeling and the guilt I was having and wondering if I was suffering from postpartum depression and he was such an encouragement to me in reassuring me and comforting me.

Side note: Anthony has always been the one afraid he couldn't love or wouldn't be able to divide his attention for each child the same whereas I'm all let's have 20 kids and we will love them equally and now I am the one who was struggling with wondering if my time was enough with just two. It's funny how that worked out and he ended up having to lift me up.

Since that talk, I have been even more intentional with my time with Sophia and baby Anthony and trying to give myself grace because I can't do it all even if I want to. My mood has also greatly improved and I don't have that guilty feeling hanging over my head anymore. I'm able to enjoy baby Anthony and all his sweet little baby coos.

One Month Update

My big guy is the chunkest thing. He started off wearing size 1 diapers right away and after about 2 boxes is now in size 2 and we are thinking we may have to move him up to size 3 already! He also skipped newborn clothes altogether and went straight to 3 months and even now some 3 months are getting too small so moving up to 6 months has started happening at 6 weeks old!

This guy also started trying to hold his head up right away which we think is because he has such a huge neck. Well this guy is just huge all over who am I kidding, haha. He has even started trying to scoot when doing tummy time, like what the what? He is really trying to speed ahead in milestones all at once and mommy just needs him to slow down.


His sleep has been somewhat of a struggle this first month which honestly is to be expected since we are all adjusting to this new way of life. The first few weeks, he took really good naps during the day and decided to have parties at night and we quickly knew we needed to help him change that because when you have more than 1 kid, there is no sleeping when the baby sleeps. Once we finally got him sleeping pretty well at night (it only took about a day or two for him to catch on), this guy decided we wouldn't take naps during the day. He would only take one nap during the day and luckily he would do that at Sophia's nap time so we got some type of break from both kids. Although his nap times during the day were hit or miss, his bedtime was amazing. He was sleeping from around 8-11 pm, nurse back to sleep until 2 am, nurse, sleep until 4 or 5 am, nurse, sleep until around 7 or 8 am and up for the day so about every 2-3 hours. He quickly dropped the 11 pm feeding when I started to dream feed him at that time. I only did it twice so now at 6 weeks old, he is in bed around 8 or 8:30 pm, he wakes up to nurse around 2 am, again around 5 or 6 am, again around 8 or 9 am and wakes for the day around 10 or 11 am. This is on average, there are still nights were he may wake up one extra time or his day may start at 9 am instead but overall he is a much better sleeper at night then Sophia was as an infant. The last week daytime naps have been very consistent and going good so hoping that will continue.


So my biggest lesson with being a mom with two under two is to work on my time management. There is so much going on and so much to do but my kiddos come first. Dishes will always be there, the floor will always need to be cleaned but they are only this little for so long. Therefore, I want to make the most of my time with them and when they are napping at the same time or playing independently, I want to be productive with that time instead of mindless scrolling on social media.





 Photos by LaPalomento Photography

Now I cannot stop singing the praises of the DockATot Deluxe. We never planned to be a co-sleeping family, Sophia forced it upon us and once we found out we were expecting baby Anthony, I couldn't imagine him not sleeping with us but I knew the only way I would feel safest is if we had the DockATot Deluxe. But what makes the Deluxe so amazing is the versatility and the different ways you can use it so I am sharing four ways we make use of our DockATot Deluxe.

Quick Disclosure: We do not leave baby Anthony unattended in the DockATot while on an elevated surface (such as the bed or couch), I was only away long enough to quickly snap these photos.

Co-sleeping

The most obvious way is as a co-sleeper. I love that we are able to have baby Anthony in our bed and I can easily place my hand on his chest to ensure he is breathing (when Sophia was born I barely slept because I was constantly leaning over the bassinet to check her breathing status before she forced us to co-sleep). The bumpers/sides of the DockATot help prevent Anthony or me from rolling on top of baby Anthony and they also help baby Anthony feel snug and secure like he is still in the womb. So basically we are all sleeping easier because of the DockATot.

Lounging

Another way we like to use the DockATot Deluxe is when we are around the house. Sophia loves playing with her toys all over the house and I love that I can easily carry the Deluxe to whichever room she wants to play in to have a place for baby Anthony to lounge in while we watch big sister play.

Tummy Time

During our play times with Sophia, we also use the DockATot for tummy time for baby Anthony so he can strengthen those neck muscles. We just put his arms and chest on the side of the bumpers and put toys in front of his line of vision. The bumpers help keep his chest up to prevent his head from hitting the ground or possibly smothering himself from not being able to lift his head.

Travel

Besides co-sleeping, this is my favorite use for the DockATot. My in-laws live about an hour away in the country and they do not drive to the city very often so we make almost weekly trips out there to visit them and stay for about 6 or more hours. Basically an entire day. Because the Deluxe is so compact (you could buy a heavy duty case here, we have one for Sophia's Grand and love it!), it travels very easily which makes nap-times at grandma and grandpa's successful 99% of the time. Baby Anthony gets to have the comfort and scent of his own bed wherever we go so he is guaranteed to always have a good sleep unless of course he is going through a growth spurt or teething but that's another story, haha.

 Do you have a DockATot? What are your favorite ways to use it?

Please feel free to share with your friends and family who would love the DockATot!

A few years ago (when we were in our early 20s), I bought him this flashy watch. Think of a grill but for your wrist. Yeah I blame being a 19/20 year old, haha. Anyways, I figured it was time for an upgrade and a more sophisticated watch. I have been eyeing JORD wood watches for almost a year now and when they reached out to me to try out their new holiday collection, there was no hesitation on my part to get one for Anthony as a gift.

First, I love the look of wood tones. The grain in wood just does something for me. Secondly, JORD watches are the perfect combination of sophistication and causal. You can easily dress this watch up or down for everyday wear.

And as y'all I know, I'm not that good at keeping gifts from Anthony since I just get too excited so he helped me pick out the one  he liked the most which he chose the Frankie watch in Koa & Ash and I already gave it to him to start wearing. I told y'all I'm the worst but how amazing does this watch look on his wrist? I mean obviously he can make anything look good but I feel this JORD watch suits him perfectly and was the perfect gift.

Now for the good stuff for you guys! Every year JORD has amazing holiday deals but this year they are having their largest discounts ever just for ya'll! Each person who enters their information here will instantly be emailed with an exclusive holiday coupon code worth 25% off! Perfect timing for your holiday shopping so be sure to add JORD to your Black Friday shopping list. 

Today I wanted to share my favorite nursing sleep bra and this one isn't a bra per say. It is actually a nightgown with a light support built in bra that has clip down's which makes nursing extremely easy. There are a few reasons I am loving this nursing nightgown more so than an actual nursing sleep bra. 

The main reason is layers. I get hot really easily so previously I would only wear a nursing sleep bra to sleep and that was it and that can get cold but then if I were to wear a shirt or sleep dress over it I would have to lift up the shirt and pull down the bra and guys that is just too much when you are groggy in the middle of the night. So this Lucille Nursing Nightgown from Kindred Bravely is so lightweight and easy to work with. 

I also love that I was able to wear it during my pregnancy and it fit over my third trimester bump perfectly and now it helps hide my postpartum bump. It is completely flattering and definitely makes this mama feel feminine and sexy despite all the craziness that comes at the end of pregnancy and postpartum. 

Also, if we are being honest, you will often find me wearing this nightgown throughout the day as well because it is really that comfortable.

Do you have a favorite nursing sleep bra or nightgown?

I love how it has a flowy drape that could easily disguise your postpartum bump so when I saw this maternity peplum top at PinkBlush, I knew I had to try it out. 

Again, what I love about PinkBlush is that their items stretch across your closet no matter what season of life you are in. Even though this top is technically labeled as maternity, my normal size fits me perfectly postpartum. The only con, depending on the importance to you, is that it isn't nursing friendly but I honestly don't mind lifting up my shirt to nurse my little babe so it isn't really a con to me. I guess from breastfeeding for 15-16 months with Sophia and now baby Anthony being my second babe to breastfeed, I feel more confident and don't necessarily need my tops to be nursing friendly. My bras are a different story, haha.

What is your favorite style to wear postpartum?

As the same with my breastfeeding kit, I am using a small tub from the hospital. It isn't the most aesthetically pleasing sight but it is free and it holds everything perfectly.

Most of these items I keep in my postpartum kit, I brought home from the hospital so be sure to check out my post on what to ask for before leaving the hospital.

Mesh Undies

I love love love mesh undies and take as many as I can get from the hospital which was six pairs both times. I just hand wash them immediately after using them and air dry so I can use them for up to two weeks. You could use them longer but I only needed them for two weeks after giving birth to Sophia and one week after baby Anthony.

Bed Liners 

If you have read my post on what to take from the hospital, I shared some photos of how I combine bed liners and the pads to get a more secure protection from leakage depending on how heavy your bleeding is. This time around, I didn't need the extra protection but it's better to have them on hand just in case.

Perineal Wash 

This little squirt bottle makes the clean up easier and what better is that it is free from the hospital.

Pads

I think this should, at least, be the most obvious thing you need after giving birth since you will have bleeding for a few weeks. I like to have extra heavy overnight on hand as well as my normal pads but again it just depends on how heavy your bleeding is. Also keep in mind that you cannot use tampons for about 6 weeks so have those pads handy.

Dermoblast 

Another freebie from the hospital. After cleaning everything up, spray this all up and down there for some nice numbing effect.

What do you keep in your postpartum kit? What is your absolute must-have?

I hope these posts have been helpful for you in creating your new mom survival kits. Please feel free to pin and share these posts with your friends and family as you see fit.