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Thursday, March 14, 2013

Thankful Thursday

I decide everyday this year I want to choose something I was most thankful for that day. I'm hoping by focusing on something I am thankful for each day, I will become more grateful and appreciative towards all the blessings I receive from The Lord and His provision in my life.

March 13 was the day my mommy died (I refer to my biological mother as mommy and my aunt who raise me as mom). This Wednesday was 12 years and for the first time I was struggling on how I should feel. When I was younger my mom (the aunt you raised me) took me to Galveston where we spread my mommy's and daddy's ashes on their death anniversaries or birthdays. We would let up balloons that said we missed them or happy birthday. After that we would get a Carmel apple as a dessert while we were in Galveston. We haven't done that in 6 years. This year I decided I wanted to do the same thing again however we weren't able to. So I was pondering the whole day, do I celebrate her death? But, I have no idea where she is. I don't know what my mommy's relationship with God was like when she was alive. However, I didn't want to mourn either. I've done that already and didn't want to restart the process all over again. (Now that I am writing this, maybe it would be a good idea to mourn again or take a grieving class at least).
As the day went on, I thought of how thankful I was for the decision my mommy did make on who was to raise me. I am who I am in part to my mom who raised me as her own. For that I am thankful and celebrate knowing I was loved.

Here is my thankful list for the week:

1. Date nights❤
2. Lazy mornings with my love
3. My doggies
4. Exercise
5. Bowling
6. My mom
7. Walks with my Molly

What are you thankful for this week? How do you use times of mourning to be thankful?
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