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Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

Friday, January 1, 2021

I Quit Nursing School

I Quit Nursing School


As I played with the words to share my decision, I realized this may be a very unpopular decision especially in our modern society with high value for career minded women. However I want to be very clear:

I am not JUST a stay at home mom. 


I CHOOSE to be a stay at home mom. 


We make sacrifices in our lifestyle that allow me to spend this time with our children and I wouldn’t want it any other way. You don’t have to understand it and it’s okay if you choose differently for your family and if you don’t have the choice, my heart goes out to you.


I don’t know about you but I process things better with details. I like to know the overall picture which gives me a better understanding so let’s rewind a bit.


My first few years of college, I worked in childcare and ultimately changed my major from nursing to education right when I was about to start the actual nursing program. I loved teaching and being there with these kiddos as they learned and discovered something new (I was an assistant pre-k teacher), I wanted to experience that beyond just a college job. Anyways, every once in a while, I would be asked to relieve one of the infant room workers for their lunch break. Playing with babies and experiencing their firsts - the heartbreak I felt for the moms, that was the moment I knew I WANTED to stay home with my future children.


You combine that experience with my experience of loss and little memory of just being with my parents, this drove my desire even more to be there for every moment with my children especially those early years. 


Fast-forward, add some kids later and Anthony gets sick. Really sick. Our life is turned upside down trying to figure out what is going on. This experience takes me back to three year old Stormie who is about to turn four whose dad dies two weeks before her birthday. My daughter is two years old and in about two weeks (at that time) will turn three as her daddy is in the hospital with some unknown infection. The PTSD and anxiety was awful although I hid it very well from most.


Then we add on no income, unstable job situation for Anthony which leads to him being wrongfully terminated a few months later (he was on sick leave for 12 weeks). He found a new job a few weeks later and within a month back in the hospital with a different major infection.


Amidst this, I decided to return to nursing school because between education and nursing, it allowed the most flexible schedule for me to still be home with my kids during the day and work nights and weekends as needed whenever Anthony gets sick. Therefore I got registered to update a few pre-reqs.


Here we are a year later with everything done, prepared and ready to apply for my BSN program and I decided not to do it. 


I cannot afford to miss anymore time with my kids while they are this little because I am driven by fear. 


These past few weeks as I have dug in, I realized nursing school was my way to control and this backup plan I created became what I was putting my trust in instead of God. A good thing (a backup plan) turned into a god thing and that’s when I ultimately decided it was best to step back, refocus my trust and faith in God and His care for me whatever His plan may be in our life. This decision also allows me the freedom to truly enjoy this time I want to have with my children as they will only be this little once.


If I should have learned anything these past 3.5 years dealing with a layoff, selling our home, sickness, wrongful termination, and more sickness mixed with everything else on our plates in between, it is that God provides. 


The people God has placed in our lives, this city we settled in as a compromise, the church we “randomly” found from a google search, was all preordained by God. If He provided for us through all those dark and murky waters, He will continue to provide for us no matter what the future looks like.


Therefore I am CHOOSING to stay home with my children and actively work on trusting God with the details.


I am not JUST a stay at home mom. It is my privilege and joy to spend the days with my babies. I want to soak up every moment with my favorite human beings and build memories that will last a lifetime.


I encourage you to rephrase the way you look at and speak about YOUR choices, whatever they may be, in a positive way. Don’t devalue yourself.

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stormieariel
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Thursday, February 7, 2019

Let’s Chat! | Growth During Struggles

Let’s Chat! | Growth During Struggles


If your new around here, you probably don’t know this but I’m not the typical blogger. I randomly take breaks from blogging because, well life happens. Real life. Don’t get me wrong I love blogging. I love writing. I love forming the connections I have made through this digital life but I have priorities. Or at least I try to because let’s me honest we all get sucked into the scrolling mindlessly through social media while life happens around you. However, I’m breaking that cycle. I won’t allow it to hold power over me anymore of having to see every single post ever posted by this person or that person or needing to know who is doing what at this moment in time.

Now hear me out, there is absolutely nothing wrong with checking in on your favorite blogger or social media influencer but when that profile or person gets the best of you instead of the people in your real life, in your home. There’s a problem. And that’s me. Hi, my name is Stormie and I am a social mediaholic. I love catching up with people on Instagram but I hate having phone conversations. I love posting and watching instastories but I’m actually an introvert and don’t like talking in person unless we are already close friends.

So this social media break has happened for quite a few reasons. The main reason was the Lord was speaking to me. I have always wondered when people would say “The Lord spoke to me” or I’m following the Lord’s command and I always wondered like how? Did you hear a big booming voice “Stormie get off social media” with an echo? Well no. It was subtle and over time. The Lord spoke to me through books I was reading, through people I was following on social media, conversations I was having in my bible study group, etc. There was a common theme being brought to my attention across all areas of my life and it felt so strong that I knew it was coming from the Lord.

Short back story, my husband was laid off (I spoke about it some here and here) and we were dealing with unemployment for 6+ months and now underemployment. Around the same time I’m hearing the Lord speak to me, Anthony and I both also feel the Lord telling us it was finally time to say goodbye to our house. In hindsight, we were wrestling with the Lord for months and months before this without realizing it (or wanting to realize) so when we did make the decision to list our house for sell, we were at such peace because we knew it was the Lord’s will.

So the time-frame for us to be out of the house lined up with the holidays which I thought taking the whole month of December off would be the best because one it would give us time to get all moved in and settled and secondly what perfect time to create a new rhythm and routine with my children. I was also planning to use this time to intentionally plan what my life would look like on social media and how I needed to create boundaries and balance my priorities on my spiritual life and my family life first.


But alas, the Lord had other plans and other familial obligations popped up that took majority of my attention in December and half of January. Now that things have slowed down on that front, I have been trying to find my way back to my initial mission. Getting the fire back in me of being intentional with my spiritual life and my kids. Creating a new rhythm and routine with a purpose. And eventually get back to blogging with a game plan.

As of right now, I have been checking in on Facebook and Instagram every so often but not being active much other then selling stuff on marketplace. I have felt I wanted to wait until I was in a good place in my spiritual life and my family life. It’s not to say my faith has been wavering, in fact it’s quiet the opposite.

During this last year and a half, this is the most dependent and closest I have felt to the Lord. I feel like when everything was going great, it was so easy to put God on the back burner and say a prayer here and there. Head to church on Sunday’s, attend bible study and go through the motions all while neglecting to ever open up my Bible. My God has shown me so much and has taught me so much in trusting in Him, leaning not on my own understanding when things aren’t going the way I planned. I try so hard to control so much out of fear and I have learned that’s not okay.

I’m not saying you should never make plans or goals, it’s great to plan but it’s also very important to remain flexible because we don’t have the whole picture. God does. And guess what. His plans are so far better for our lives then we could have ever imagined. The good and the bad.

Side story about the “bad”: I do not know the reason I had to grow up without my biological parents (in case your unaware, my parents died when I was really young and my aunt who I call mom raised me) but what I do know is I would not be the mother I am today to my children if it wasn’t for that significant lost in my life as a child. For that I am thankful that I am more in tune to the needs of my children. I am far from the perfect mother but I am proud of the mother I am. No one could ever take that confidence away from me. That confidence comes from the “bad hand” I was dealt and honestly, looking my children in their faces the way I do, there is not one thing I would change in my life that lead me to this point and that is thanks to God.

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” -Romans 8:28 ESV

What is something you have felt the Lord speak to you lately? Do you try to plan or control your life out of fear? How has your childhood shaped you into the parent you are (or plan to be)?
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stormieariel
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Thursday, May 17, 2018

6 Ways to Help a Family in Need

6 Ways to Help a Family in Need


As y'all know Anthony and I have been on this yo-yo unemployed/underemployed life for 10 months now and we have had so many people in our life help us along the way to make this time a tad easier although the only thing that would make this easier would be a stable income (just being honest). Often times people do ask how can they help and maybe it's pride or maybe it's not wanting to be a burden or maybe a mix of both but it is hard just saying what you need so I decided to put a list together of the ways you can come alongside a family you may know that is struggling with unemployment or underemployment and help them during this difficult time.

1. Monetary donation 

We were blessed at the beginning of this journey by a family that gave us a monetary donation and we held on to it until we absolutely needed to use it on bills. This is honestly the biggest way you can help someone although you know the family best and know if they would be wise with this donation or not. If you feel they would spend this unwisely, maybe pay a bill for them yourself as in you call the company and give the account number and payment.

2. Food

There are so many subscription boxes out for everything including meals so gifting a one time (or reoccurring) meal box to a family in need would be an amazing blessing. You could even consider preparing a meal yourself and dropping it off to the family to avoid high cost on yourself (this is also a great idea for families welcoming new children either by birth or adoption, I also plan to share ways to help a family with a new baby/child in the future so stay tuned for that as well). 

3. Gift cards

Provide gift cards from a local grocery store (possibly one that also has a gas station). This will allow the family to get food as needed, household items like toilet paper, laundry soap, etc., or even gas for their vehicle.

4. Diapers/Wipes

If there are young children in the family consider donating diapers and wipes to them (if they cloth diaper ask what type of detergent they use and donate that to them). Also consider donating menstrual items for the young girls and women in the family or teaching them about menstrual cups and cloth pads that can be reused each cycle (I also plan to discuss this in the future further).

5. Clothing

Again if they have young children, they grow out of things extremely fast so consider offering them your children's hand me downs or even buying clothes from a second hand store (see my tips for thrift shopping children's clothes here). Helping a family in need doesn't have to be expensive.

6. Pray

And I mean really pray for them. In our society, we easily say "I'll pray for you" or "We are praying" and never do or my favorite and unrealistic phrase "claim it in the name of Jesus and it is yours" as if Jesus is a genie and we rubbed his lamp for three wishes. But really truly pray for them as you pray for your own family and your own needs, pray that God will build their trust and faith in Him, that God will be glorified in their struggles and that they will cast their worries onto Jesus and God will lead and guide them on their real life scary decisions that need to be made.


Often times, it is better to just do these things without asking the family in need because sometimes it is hard to swallow the pride and admit you need help so just ask the type of laundry soap they use or for their account number to a billing company (I wonder if you could just provide the name and address to the billing company and surprise the family with an anonymous bill payment). There are so many other ways that you could do to help a family in need, these were just the ones that have been incredibly helpful for us personally thus far so if you have any other ideas, please leave them in the comments below and as always I created a pinnable image to share with friends and family as you see fit.

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stormieariel
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Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Unemployed Life + Five Month Update

Unemployed Life + Five Month Update


This will probably be one of the most vulnerable posts I write. I have debated sharing this part of our life in my public social media life because I do not want pity at all (pride much?) however the longer we are in this season, the harder it is and if I can help just one other person or family who may be on this same journey then it would be worth sharing. I briefly mentioned Anthony was back working but the contract ended much sooner then anticipated so we are back at square one except this time we don't have the security of unemployment since it ended a few days before he was offered the contract position. When we asked for an extension for unemployment, he was declined because Texas Workforce Commission is out of budget from extending unemployment to the numerous Hurricane Harvey victims who are also out of work. So it has been 9 months of the unemployed life and the longer we do not have a steady substantial income, the more assistance we need (obviously).

Over these last few months, I have been doing research as well as friends and family sharing different assistance programs that are out there and offered not only by our government but also local and/or national organizations so I wanted to compile a list of all the programs I know about and a little bit about what they offer. Some will be local to me (Houston area) while others are national and you will just need to find the location in your area.

Food Assistance

Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) - nutrition assistance to eligible, low-income individuals and families.

Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) - The Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) provides Federal grants to States for supplemental foods, health care referrals, and nutrition education for low-income pregnant, breastfeeding, and non-breastfeeding postpartum women, and to infants and children up to age five who are found to be at nutritional risk.

Eat On Feets - a network where families can share their breastmilk in a safe and ethical manner.

Human Milk 4 Human Babies - global milk-sharing network

Diaper Assistance

Share the Love Program - low-income families who receive assistance from programs like WIC and TANF may be able to receive a set of cloth diapers — for free.

The Diaper Foundation - Houston area assistance for disposable diapers

Cash Assistance

Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) - from what I can gather on the application process is you are given cash assistance either on a monthly basis or a one time lump sum payment. I will keep you all updated if I learn more based on approval otherwise feel free to comment if you know more about the TANF program.

I am sure there are numerous other programs so if you know of any that I did not mention, please feel free to share in the comments below so if anyone else needs more assistance it can easily be found all in one place. Even though this is a really tough season, it has been amazing seeing the ways the Lord has provided for our NEEDS and the people he has used in our lives. We have seen how far he has carried us thus far and know he will continue to provide for us.

Five Month Update

It's so crazy how fast time goes when you are the parent but when we were kids time couldn't go fast enough. My big guy is definitely our happy baby, always full of smiles and giggles to anyone around. He loves talking non-stop and sometimes I wonder if he will start talking before Sophia (although her vocabulary has increased tremendously the last few weeks). He is finally an amazing napper but that's because he decided he wanted more one on one time with mommy at nights so you win some and you lose some (sleep).

Five Month Stats
Weight: ???
Height: ???
Head Circumference: ??

Firsts
big boy convertible carseat (still rear-facing)
Easter

Loves
mommy
daddy
smiling

Hates
dirty diapers
waiting to eat
anything being taken away from him

What I Want to Remember
his laughter
the long pieces of hair on his right side of his head while on the left side rubbed short
his screeching voice when he baby talks

Again please comment below of any other assistance programs you may know of that I did not mention so this can be a place to help others who are in a similar situation as this. I do also plan to share more posts in the future for those of you who have never been in the situation and want to know how you can help families in need so stay tuned (UPDATE: see 6 Ways to Help a Family in Need here). Please feel free to share this post with your friends and family and as always I created a pinnable image below.

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stormieariel
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